I'm BUSY being jobless

Last Friday Noodle and I saw Xanadu. IT WAS SO MUCH FUN. It was hilarious. We were laughing the whole time. Douglas Carter Beane bascially took the idea of the movie and then created his own wonderful campy delightfulness. James Carpinello broke his foot and so one of his understudies went on. He was okay, but you could tell he was struggling, but he was on freaking skates. Anyhoo, turns out that Noodle knows the choreographer, Dan Knechtges, so we chatted with him a bit after. His choreography really was a highlight. SO MUCH FUN. Anyhoo, I would be interested to see Cheyenne Jackson's take on the lead. I believe he goes in this week and will play the role until James Carpinello comes back. This could totally take off with a cult following, if only people would go and see it. I wonder if they actually will. Kerry Butler rocked my world and Mary Testa made me pee myself and Noodle a couple times. I want to be Mary Testa. Sometimes, I think I am. I plan on going 9 more times if anyone is interested.

The Office is over. I was informed on Friday that I was being killed off the show. How did my character die? An angry executive was so livid that his sandwich arrived 20 minutes late that he spontaneously combusted. One of his angry executive arms torpedoed from his body directly into my jugular and I died immediately. Such drama. Now I have to find a new role. I'm considering this new episodic entitled, "Over-paid temp." I'll let ya'll know.

My first voiceover coaching was such fun. I really had a great time and learned so much in my jam-packed hour. It turns out that I am "very high energy." Which makes me well-suited to "kids stuff." I worked on a really fun spot for Discovery Kids which was all about fungi and toe cheese, etc. Ew. And my challenge as the vo talent was to make sure that "Ew" was in my voice. FUN TIMES. I can't wait until my next session. Holla!

That's that for now. Have to get back to my rigorous schedule of watching daytime television.

Coming Soon:

-Xanadoodle
-The end of THE OFFICE
-My first voiceover coaching...SO MUCH FUN.

Weekend

Hey, I have a bunch of things to mention, but am feeling a little o’erwhelmed by The Office today so I’m just going to jot down a few thougts.

Friday, Farrah’s show at NDG, “Holy S@!!@!@@@@!” was quite enjoyable. It had a lot of very funny moments and some hot dancing. I gotsta get me one of them dancer boys…maybe.

Saturday we saw the very very brave Darladiva and her fellow funny folks in their improv graduation show. Some, like Dar, were very funny, and some, like frizzy haired girl, were not so funny. It got me to thinking if I could actually do that. I don’t know. I mean I am capable, but terrified. I suppose that’s reason enough, but I JUST DON’T KNOW. Good work Dar. Happy Graduation.

After the improv, we gawked at some circus freaks who were busy shopping at the outdoor flea circus, I mean market, I mean circus, that was on 26th Street. Verry interesting. Then we made our way to Central Park for Madame Renea Knight’s birthday shin-dig. It was a lot of fun. Drinking and people watching and flirting with a freckle. Weird Brendan Frasier Moon Shine Guy, etc. We ended up having dinner at the Boat Basin, which I never even knew existed. Pretty cool. Reminiscent of the Beer Garden in Queens, but in Manhattan. Woot. Then we walked MRK home to her new apartment. It is in a great location. Really great. She passed out and when she awoke her stuff had been moved into her closet and her bed was all set up. We don’t know how it happened, but it did. Then we went home and passed out.

Sunday we had brunch at our new favorite brunch place Maracas. It was Noodle, Doodle, and MRKoodle. It was really great and we all have to go back ASAP. I mean all you can drink margaritas and you can order fajitas or taco salads or or or or for less than $20. AMAZING.

THEN…it was home for a quick rest before heading to see Niwa’s one act. It was very funny and really REALLY stood out from the other pieces that we saw. Everyone involved should feel really proud of what was accomplished.

It was a very full weekend and I had a great time. Now I sit here wishing that next weekend had the same fun in store. Who knows? Oh at some point I was a whore. Yay.

I want to fast forward my life

I want to zoom ahead past this hurdle.

I want the money-flow to feel less tainted.

I want to hop out of bed with pep not droop in my step.

I want to hone in on voiceover potential.

I want to say goodbye to paying interest on purchases long forgotten.

I want Corporation Corporate to KISS MY TALENTED ASS!

I want to take pride in my crispy red skin achieved after a week in the sun.

I want to listen to music outdoors sans walls sans limitations sans burden.

I want to hear my voice on an mp3.

I want to sing for Scar and be taken seriously.

I want to feel elated when someone takes my hand unexpectedly (and I'd like him to be hot).

I want to fast forward my life.

Get me out of now.

Hooray for Tuesday! (or something like that)

Friday night Darladiva and I had a lovely date. We went for sushi at a cute little place called Aoki. For some reason they kept taking the drink menu from us. So I had to keep asking, “Could I see the drink menu?” It was funny at the time. Let’s just pretend I didn’t bring it up. After our lovely dinner by a fountain, we walked next door to the Longacre Theatre where Talk Radio is playing. Oooh Daddy, Liev Schreiber is hot and good and hot. And good. (and hot). It’s a really great play and I really enjoyed the voices. I enjoyed Liev’s “radio” voice and I also really enjoyed all of the voices of the people who would call into his talk show. I’m a fan of the vo, as you know. There was a talk back afterwards that we had no idea was happening, so we decided to stay. There was a guest who was an actual talk radio host who talked about that bigot guy in NJ, etc. The most interesting thing he said is that talk radio is going to get bigger and bigger in the age of iPods when you can get any song you want when you want it, you don’t need a dj and commercials getting in your way. So radio of the future will be all talk. Innnteresting. Also, Liev was hot. Hott.

Saturday, Noodle and I decided to see a movie. Pirates of Doodle? Nope. Shrek the Doodle? Nope. Doodleman 3? Nope. We saw Bug. Oh my lordy. I still don’t really know what happened or why. Apparently the play that it is based on is very good and had a very successful run Off-Broadway a few years ago. I’m going to have to do some research and get the damned play, because the movie was baffling. It wasn’t good. Please don’t see it. BLAH. After that we went for dinner at a cute Mexican place in the West Village called Maracas. They have Mexican brunch, so we should check that out SOON. Maybe not this weekend since everyone and their dog has something going on this weekend, except me, I just have to attend everyone’s dog’s events. Holla! After dinner we went to Marie’s. Noodle’s new roomie ended up meeting us there and we sang our faces off all night. So much so that my voice was totally shot Sunday morning and Noodle’s diaphragm was sore. For some reason when I’m at a divey piano bar I think I’m a baritenor. I ain’t. Sigh.

Sunday, we went out to Queens for Niwa’s birthday. It was a hoot as always. Such a fun crowd to sit around and make fun of Czechs with. Czech please! Then Sunday night I met Cricket for sangria at Maryann’s before we went to Mr. Black. It was a fun night, but at some point I fell down a flight of stairs, rolled my ankle, busted my head on something and made out with a cute young Dominican. I then got paranoid that he was going to steal my wallet, so I just left (Cricket had already left as he had a full day of yoga and grocery selling ahead).

Monday, I did my best to hide from the world. I ended up watching all of Angels in America, which I had not seen yet. I want to marry it. I wept, I laughed, I had dread, I had hope. It’s a masterpiece.

And here I sit at The Office, wondering if I really want to check my bank account to see how much money I really spent this weekend. Woops.

Doooooooooodle.

Thursdoodle

It’s quiet here on set at The Office, which kind of makes me a bit on edge that at any give moment some e-fire is going to e-rupt and I’ll e-die. But maybe that’s just my paranoia. MAYBE! Tonight Noodle and I are going to see Show Business, which the lovely Miss Gmeyster has chatted about over on her blog. Check it out or die. I’m excited to see the film. Of the four shows discussed (Avenue Q, Caroline or Change, Wicked, and Taboo) I just missed Caroline. I was p-iz-oor back then, so it’s a wonder I got to see any shows at all. I remember Darladiva and I having a very entertaining time at Taboo, but also knowing it would be closing moments from opening. Sadly. I enjoy both the London cast recording as well as the Broadway. But I’m a fan of camp which this show epitomizes. Darladiva (and Smoosh?), Noodle, and maybe Cricket(?), and I were at the Tony party for Avenue Q so I’m hoping that maybe if we look closely, we’ll see one of our ears or something, as we reluctantly made friends with Jai Rodriguez, my self-proclaimed nemesis. I'll get you Culture Guy! Anyhoodle, that’s tonight.

Last night, after 195 minutes of build up, Jordin won American Idol. I’m glad. Good work. Now record an album (whatever that is) so I can buy it, thanks. Kelly Clarkson sang her new single Never Again. It was hott (she was nott so much…who’s her stylist?). I always pine for my one true love Clay Aiken to make an appearance on such fluffy filler-y finale shows, but alas, he did not. Probably because he was attending some sort of Un-gay event. Sigh. Someday Clay, someday. On your own terms. In my room. Thanks.

The weather in NYC has been lovely/bearable. Tomorrow the angry humidity begins and I have to figure a way of doodling to work without becoming a heaping mess of sweat. Fun times. I need an air conditioned bubble, like the ones hamsters hang out in. You know. You know.

I want to tell you what’s up this weekend, but then I’ll have nothing to post tomorrow. So, you’ll just have to wait. I’m seeing another straight play. Guess which one.

O o d l d e

Return of the Jedi (I mean Doodle-i), I mean Popeye, I mean SHUT UP AND GET TO WRITING DOODLE.

Gawd.

Macoosh wants to know 5 reasons why I blog. 1. Because I want to write everyday. I don’t do that, but I want to and that's what this little site allows. It’s as simple as that. 2. The stories that make up my life and those of other bloggers out there are perfect material for sketch comedy shows, for Parodivas Variey Hours, for audition monologues that casting directors really HAVEN’T heard, etc. 3. That’s why I’m here 4. I’m queer get used to 5. doodle.

Kevin Spacey was absolutely amazing in A Moon for the Misbegotten. Eve Best was also great, but I found myself so drawn to the tiny nuances he gave to this very interesting drunkard. Lovely. Lovely.

I went with one of my mostest favoritest people to see Deuce. Granted, I was not feeling well, but it was boring. It was great to see them in person on stage doing stuff, but my goodness I don’t care about tennis. I don’t know if you know that. I mean, do you know that? Anyhoo, lovely to see Cricket.

The Office is sort of weird at the moment. While playing my role, I’ve also been going on for the role that I understudy this week. I guess that’s fun. I guess I really don’t care.

I’ve scheduled all of my voiceover coachings, demo prep, and demo recording. As of July 25th all of those sessions will be complete. It’s very exciting, but I wish it didn’t seem so far away.

BEACH HOUSE!!

Equity: To be or NON to be

I am NON. I tried three times throughout the course of the day yesterday to get seen for the York Theatre Company’s production of It’s a Bird It’s a Plane It’s Superman. It was my first time “crashing” an Equity Principal audition. It wasn’t nearly as terrifying as the stories I’ve heard of open calls at the AEA audition place (where I’ve never dared go being a NON). Anyhoo, the monitor took all the NON’s headshots/resumes into the director who then typed us out by our pictures. I brought in a photo of me as Dr. Sedg (thanks Darladiva for the advice). I sent that in with my headshot and I was one of the few NONs that the director was interested in seeing…time permitting. Well, from 12-1 time did not permit, I was instructed to come back around 3-3:30 because there were some open slot then. I ran ran RAN back to The Office and asked if it would be okay if I went back out for a bit around 3. Luckily they said yes. Unluckily, when I got back to the audition spot all the space that was originally available had been taken by EQUITY people not on the list. Oy. I asked if it would behoove me to come back at 5 and the monitor said yes. I ran ran RAN back to The Office. Worked a little longer, left work early, and then ran ran RAN back to the audition. The monitor had just released all the NONs because they were not going to get seen. I sat there, trying to cool off from all the running and listened to the last people audition. Some were good, some were bad, but no one was phenomenal. The VERY last EQUITY guy sang my song. It wasn’t funny, it wasn’t moving; it just was. Anyhoo, the director has my headshot and a picture of me doing acrobatics with my face. Is this what we call the WORK part of trying to be a working actor? I left disappointed and TIRED. I trudged off to the gym to let out some aggression. However, as I trod to the dressing room, a charming smile greeted me from the depths of a contraption that makes your delts deltier or your lats latier or your quads quadra-please stop me. (My aggression quickly flitted by the crunching meatheads and out the steamy windows across the way). We chatted about possibly seeing Coram Boy because he heard it was the worst thing ever and we both enjoy a good flop. Anyhoo, I’m looking forward to hanging out with him on Saturday. We shall call him Charming.

Tonight is my voiceover evaluation. Wish me luck. I’m really looking forward to getting behind a mic with some copy. Woo hoo.

Doodle.

One Year Blog-iversary Post 4 (SCROLL DOWN AND READ IN ORDER please?)

I LOVE ALL OF YOU SO MUCH (yes, even you Sir Willio. Now get back to those taxes). Aren’t you all excited for the Spring weather that will soon be upon us? I can smell the pedicures. What? I think ew. But stars always get pedicures, and so must I. It just better not rain on my newly clipped and polished toes because that will make me MAD (scientist).

Thanksgiving is all about the big turkey (Carter).

I’m glad that my new role in The Office is permitting me to write the LONGEST BLOG POST IN THE HISTORY OF BLOGGING! Thanks office, thanks. And thanks for also paying me enough so that I can do occasional showcases for free. That’s good.

Man am I a whore.

But back to The Office for a second. That’s it. One second.

My dear readers/friends, the end of this long long long…long post is almost here. I just want you all to know that you’re the one(s) that I want to suck my youngblood. What? What does that mean? You can’t end like that!

Doodle.

My homo-logical clock is ticking and other schmidt

Maybe it’s this play. Maybe. Maybe it’s that my lease is up for renewal, and I may have missed the opportunity. Maybe my girlish figure is pumping too much estrogen these days, but Doodle wants to find Mr. Moodle and move into a giant one bedroom and make babies. Well, maybe martinis instead of babies. I don’t know. I’m feeling the need for (ew!) romance. Ugh. All this sexual politics and blah blah blah that I’m around every night in rehearsal is getting to me? Somehow a play written by a feminist regarding women’s roles has put a domestic bug in my ear. How is this possible? Get out of there you silly domestic gay bug! I’ll cut you buggy. OW! I’M DEAF I’M DEAF! What? I have no idea, I’m deaf.

Today is my one year anniversary of being cast in my first role in The Office. I don’t know what that means. It’s amazing considering the ups and downs of performing this role. Sometimes I feel like I should just give up all this acting and work in an office. Like an Equity children’s theatre tour. UGH.

Where is Moodle?

When’s it going to happen?

Can I get some booze poured in my face? GAWD.

Bloggety Friday Blog

I AM SO GLAD THAT IT IS FRIDAY. It has been a very long week. I can’t take much more of this working all day and then working all night. It’s crazy. I am really looking forward to when this show is up and running and I have Sunday-Wednesday nights off. I can go to the gym, I can cook, I can watch reality tv. AND I can get to work on the Parodivas next cabaret. I’m excited about the brunch show we’re seeing on Sunday. I’m going to try to link it. One moment. Youngblood is had be is good is had is. Okay, I’m back. Woot. Then after brunch, I think I will go grocery shopping so I can make food for the week. WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. I’m so glad that Darladiva is in 9 shows and Gwenners is a budding online video star (not porn) and Niwa is a sugar mama, and Noodle only has ONE MORE MONTH, and Madame RK is okay, and Sir Willio is my co-whort. :)

Rehearsal is trucking along. I am very close to being memorized for Act 1. I have less to say in Act 2, so I hope that will move faster. We shall see. We tried some costumes last night. Nothing really fit me because I’m a giant woman. Soooo, I’m hopeful that the designer will come up with something lovely. Woot woot.

Wouldn’t it be loverly if we woke up Monday morning and ALL episodes of every sitcom like “The Office” or “Lazy Lizard” or “Too Close for Financial Discomfort” or “Advertisin’ Queens” or "The (gay) Accountant" WERE CANCELED? I heard it was possible from the fairy I met after dropping acid in my eye. Let’s all take five minutes today, turn our heads away from our monitors and our telephones and pretend that it REALLY COULD HAPPEN because some day soon it will happen and we'll be interviewed by Babwa Waltews. She'll ask, "so tell me about these bwunches." We'll all giggle, pause, and say, "who remembers?"

Enjoy the pauses.

D o o d l e

BLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHGGGGG.

I’m at a plateau with the stupid losing weight thing. It’s annoying. I just can’t seem to get over this hump. I know it’s because I don’t have time for the gym, because of rehearsal, but I have managed to squeeze it in a few times a week, somehow, because I’m crazy. Anyhoo, I wanted to lose weight to squeeze into the dress, but it doesn’t seem that’s going to happen. Maybe by the time the show closes, since I’ll have more time to workout I’ll be svelte again. Blahg.

Ummm, what else? The Office is weird. I really don’t know what my role is, but it seems to be going better than it has, ever, so I’m just going to keep on truckin’.

C9 is going okay. I’m getting closer to the characters. I just need to get off book so I can stop thinking about the lines and think about the intentions. Blahg.

The weather yesterday was glorious (I’m told).

Blahg.

As Darladiva pointed out, I look like this kangaroo.

3 Dollar Post

I kept wanting to post but work and my dentist appointment got in the way. Maaaaaaaaaaaaaan. I ended up having last night off from rehearsal which was WONDERFUL. I got to enjoy my clean apartment, and I made some food for the week so I don't spend so much money and I have something at 10:30pm when I get home. Yikes! I have made some progress on my lines but need to make A LOT MORE. Oy. I wish I could spend more time at work working on the work I want to work on but alas I have to do other work. Anyhoo, I marked kissing off that list below this weekend. If only I remembered any of their names. Sir Willio kind of recalls what they looked like. Wooot!

Tuesdays are for real posts.

Your primary focus is often on relationships, and now they are emphasized even more. Your creative instincts are also strong these days and whether they manifest in your interactions or within your own individual process, it's crucial to keep an eye on the future rather than living completely in the present.

Thanks Darladiva for reminding me that online astrologers know me better than I know myself. "Creative instincts...strong?" How did you know Online Astrologer? It is so easy to live day by day (oh dear lord these things I pray) and forget about what's ahead. Work, rehearsal, sleep, work, rehearsal, sleep, etc. I have to put dream in there. I'm dreaming that the agent I submitted to will actually open the envelope and remember me and send me an email saying, "LET'S MEET AND GET STARTED ON YOUR CAREER!" Sadly, I don't think her assistant's assistant showed her my materials. But that's okay. Thanks to Darladiva, there is a seminar that this agent does and I'm going to take. Also, once C9 is up and running, we open on April 12th, I'm going to get my voiceover demo done and doner. Then it's off to the races on the many many projects on the backburner right now. Parodivas have GOT to get back on stage by June. The first draft of Ono has to get completed and read. And I have to get my co-artistic director hat all spruced up so we can move forward with PUSH. And then there's the 10 other ideas I have running about in my brain. A show about Danny Kaye, a show about Noel Coward, a show for Noodle, Madame Renea Knight's cabaret (nudge nudge), etc etc. Anyhoo, that's where I am on performancey writer stuff.

Having two pretend boyfriends is good, don't get me wrong, butt. I'm going to end that there. I'm TOO busy to date, butt it would be nice if. Sigh.

I am 92% sure I am going to renew my lease and stay at my apartment another year. The Spring episodes of The Office are going much better, and I think I'll ask the writers to keep my character on the show through next season. Of course as we all know, this sitcom is tricky and unpredictable. WHO KNOWS???

C9 is going very well. My favorite scene thus far is the lesbian scene where my son's governess kisses my teeth. Mm hmm. You know you want it. And yes, I may have a show crush on my husband. Dean, if by chance you are reading this I am just kidding. I'm not kidding. Look a meteor ----------> (runs away screaming like a woman)

doodle.

Doodle gets real.

Okay, I admit it. I’m not being proactive about finding a role on a sitcom I’ll like. Honestly, in the not-so-back of my mind I am dreaming of having a voice over career supplemented by my part time day job as a personal assistant to a (gay) fashionista or something. Is that so wrong? I mean I have the money set aside to get my demo. I’m going to get that marked off my list in the next month or so. I’ve been given a “second chance” in my role on the sitcom The Office, so I feel I’ve got a little time to sort of see what’s out there. I don’t know. The idea of putting on my (only) suit and interviewing 7 times at 5 companies is daunting and I am avoiding it. I am. You can slap me on the hand but it won’t do any good. I do that to myself every day. Alas, that’s where I stand on the sitcom front. Trying is difficult. Right? Ugh. Maybe it’s my super-indecision and the fear that I will have to make a decision at some point? Stupid Libra. Meanwhile the casting directors of The Office are still seeing other actors. It’s not like that has ceased. BLAH!

As to my healing, sexual or otherwise, I would say it is going fairly well. I joined the gym, so for at least an hour a day I can obsess over pedaling the stupid bike a little harder, or goading myself into getting on the stupid treadmill and pretending I’m running from a serial killer or that homophobe from Grey’s Anatomy. What is up with that guy? Man. Shut your angry hole and just do your job, jerk face. Gawd. Darladiva and I are going to see Little Children some time in the near future. We haven’t finalized our plans, but I say we doin’ it. I shall let you know how it is. Since Gwentastic had be loved it, I imagine it’s gonna be goodly. There are a few of those fantasy movies I’d like to see. Arthur and the Invisibles, that one that Darladiva’s Smoosh was talking about (what was that called?), and then another one that looks like it is trying to be Narnia (Shemarnia or something?). I am like a bank on Sunday, don't make no cents. Maybe I should do some research before I start rambling on and on (see previous post) for no reason.

Tonight I am going to stare into the face of my past. Yes, that’s right ya’ll (throws up). I’m goin’ ta a rodeo barr! Yee and or Haw! It’s Gwentastic’s b-day festival. I am soo looking forward to it, but feel that with this sudden will to live the work day shall never end. It’s been between 2-3pm for at least 3 hours already. GEEZ. Can I get a can of Coors already? No love. No love at all.

Doodle.

Doodle received a letter from his Auntie SASH

Dear Auntie SASH,
Thank you for your letter regarding the seeming “collapse” of my life as recorded in this here blog. While I truly appreciate your request to “hunt someone down and kill them,” I don’t think that will be necessary. I will have to get back to you on whether or not I need you to “ruin a credit rating or two.” I may take you up on that one. As to your referring to me as a “little cowboy sheriff,” I’m just glad my mother doesn’t know how to scan pictures. That’s all I’m sayin’.

Thank you also for your reminding me that while one hand is mutilated and scary, I do still have “another hand.” I’m sorry to hear that our “aging gracefully” gene does “NOT extend to hands.” Alas.

While your sister and father, my Aunt and Grandpa may “consider Maalox one of the four food groups," I am glad to know that you are with me in knowing there is no better way to make sure you have recovered from the stomach flu than with nachos and booze. You and I ARE related Auntie SASH. We ARE.

Auntie SASH, things are going a bit better in my world. I am feeling much better about my life in this newdle year. I am still having some difficulty in my role on the television program “The Office.” They are definitely considering writing my character off the show so I have asked my agent to find me role in another similar sitcom. We shall see. I think that this change will in fact be a good one. It’s the transitions that are difficult, as you know.

Well Auntie SASH please keep in touch and please keep sending me lovely little notes. They are greatly appreciated. It’s too bad we’re not in the same time zone. We could have margaritas after work. Well, I suppose we still can, just separately. Get an extra shot of tequila for me Auntie SASH…

Your one true relative,
Nephew Doodle

Newdle Year Here I Come!! Happiness WILL BE FOUND!!!

So many exclamation points had to be killed to provide this post. Alas!!

Last week was one of the most challenging of my life. I almost said worst, but I don’t think that’s what I mean. Challenging. It’s time to start calling things what they are. Just because I burst into tears periodically throughout the day does not mean I am sad. As Noodle advised, figure out what triggered those sporadic tears, address that issue, and suddenly you’ll feel better…until two hours later I suddenly remember dreaming that my Granny (93 year old great grandmother) gave me a kiss. She was comforting me. (bursts into tears that damage his keyboard). 93;mngm lelea’ el3 o90 nmmcl htle dla e godoo dle. I am tremendously grateful for my friends. Thank you all so much for this weekend!

But, prior to the weekend, there was the event that happened. You know. Then I practically cut the tip of my finger off with one of my fancy new knives. It was so disgusting. I honestly prepared myself to die from blood loss or Tetanus as I put myself to bed. That was Wednesday night. Luckily I didn’t die, but my finger is hideous. Now I’ll never be a hand model. Boo! Then on Thursday I heard tell that Darladiva had been struck ill with heinous stomach flu. The poor dear. As I wept and drank and cooked on Thursday night I realized that throughout the entire day I had had no appetite whatsoever. I mean this isn’t all that odd, but it was even more pronounced than usual. Oh well. I had some food and went to sleep. At about 1:50 am I awoke and realized it was going to be a long night…in the bathroom. I finally stopped my visits around 7 am when I called in to The Office to let them know I was on the verge of death and could not administrate. I spent the whole day trying to get some freakin’ water down and watching tv and trying to fall into a sweet sweet coma. The coma never came, but I did sleep for a bit and I think I murdered the fever at least. Around 4:30 or so, I ventured out into the world to get some ginger ale and to find something that might be edible. I got some chicken soup and hoped for the best. The best was not to be had. Oh well. I don’t remember Friday night too well, but I guess that’s good.

Saturday I was feeling better and glad about it. I was able to have a bit of the chicken soup and I made some jell-o that seemed to be okay. I made a shopping date with Madame Renea Knight and we went to Macy’s. I honestly don’t know why. Well yes, I do know why. I sat in front of the television for 90 hours (I sleep with it on). And in those 90 hours I must have heard the “Macy’s One Day Sale all day Saturday” commercial at least 86.5 times. NO WONDER! Madame and I wandered around horrified at the clothes, the people, and the (shudders) children. WHY OH WHY OH WHY??!! Then we headed back to my place for a little drink and some Best of Eartha Kitt. Listening to songs for her cabaret in the works: Oooh la la! Then Madame dropped me off at Chevy’s where I was to meet Darladiva for some chips and a drink before meeting Crickpot and his sister to see Dreamgirls (2nd time for me). Darladiva and I ate five nachos and then realized we should head over to the theatre to ensure some good seats. We succeeded. The movie was great (again). Although some of the kids and such around us laughed during the points when the recitative was sung, IT’S A MUSICAL!!! Oh well. Whatever. Nothing will compare to my experience seeing it at the Ziegfeld, but it was fun nonetheless. Thennnnn, Darladiva, Crickpot, and I headed over to an Irish pub for a drink. We sat and had a lovely therapy session. Four drinks is cheaper than any NY therapist I know. Darladiva had to head back to Queens to take care of a soon to be ailing Smoosh and then Crickpot had to head back to his dream palace on the LES. So I text Sir Willio to come and meet me for a drink as I was not ready to go home and be alone. Oy. He met me at a nearby bar and we chatted a bit about the angry stomach flu that had attacked us. His was so bad that he had to check himself into the ER. They gave him some fluid and some anti-barfing meds…lucky. Of course as we’re sitting there, I see The BF walk by with one of his friends. He looked very happy.

I got home around 3:30 and tried to get to sleep. Sunday was the hardest for me. I just couldn’t keep the tears from flowing. It was like a Lifetime movie up in that apartment. Unfortunately my mother (played by Jill Eikenberry or Judith Light) was not there to comfort me and tell me it would all be okay. I realized I needed more friend time. I called up Crickpot and he invited me to see is new palace. We had a lovely day just chatting and pretending to work on his moving-in projects and we had some lovely pita and hummus and some ginger cookies and some beers. Then I forced him to not take yoga and watch You’re the One That I Want. Oh my. I just don’t know if I have words for this show. I mean…I guess it’s okay, but it’s also frightening. They have to do a reality show about casting a Broadway production and all they will realize is that the best talent for such things is IN NEW YORK??!!!! Ugh. I don’t know. I guess I’ll keep watching to see. Train wreck. You know. Then I hopped in a cab and headed home.

The needing of friends was not over though. Oh no. I called Noodle, but she didn’t answer. I figured she had gone to bed because she ALSO is sick. UGH! Then I called Darladiva to see if she watched the show. She didn’t. Hmm. So chatting with Darladiva got me to my front door. Then I chatted with her online once inside. Then, chatted with Noodle when she called me back. Then I headed off to bed where I cuddled up with one final friend, my stuffed Eeyore. Oh my. You gotta have friends.

Doodle!

CHRISMOODLE HAD BE HERE!!!!!!

In this episode of The Office, Mr. Doodle got a substantial bonus!! Wooo hooo! What a great episode. Mr. Doodle took his list that his friend Marla Mae Meller More had told him to make but he didn't even need it. It was a very very fast meeting that Mr. Doodle had with the owner of the company MinuteFront Poodle. Although I did hear a preview of upcoming episodes this morning and I think there is still a distinct possibility that Mr. Doodle will be asked to leave, so I hope that his correspondence with Ms. Head does in fact provide Mr. Doodle with another viable option. I read in an online chat room for The Office that Ms. Head could possibly find Mr. Doodle a position at Goldman Sachs. Hmmm. I hope those chatters are correct. Anyhoodle, enough about TV. I am leaving work early today. I'm not sure when, but early. I'm going to finish up my shopping. Thanks to Darladiva I was able to buy something for each member of my family on amazon and get it shipped. Some of it will arrive on Tuesday which is good. Who knows when the rest will be there, but I will give them a call and let them know that some stuff had be coming even if it is after Santa's Birthday. I am seeing a magic-y show tonight called Esoterica. When I was in Back to the Fabulous, the 80's pop version of 12th Night, our Malvolio was this hottie with a shaved head. He's apparently a magician as well, because Esoterica stars him! Woot woot woodle. After that I'll be headed to Jerry Scott's Christmas Sing a Long at Dannys. I've been going over the words to Your're a Mean One Mister Grinch so I can sing it. Tomorrow matinee I am seeing Butley starring Nathan Lane. I hope he acts. I mean during the holidoodles, I enjoy a good ham. I'm not gonna lie. But come on Nathan, you should at least earn your Tony for Best Actor in a Play. We shall see. Tomorrow night, I think, I'll be headed across the street from Butley to see Julianne Moore who will probably be earning her Tony for Best Actress in a Play in The Vertical Hour. Then there'll be brunch on Sunday and then another sing a long at The BF's apartment for Christmas Eve. Then we are opening presents at his place, mostly because he has a fireplace for Xmas Eve which will be romantic a;sou0q203n, sorry I just threw up a little in my mouth. Breakfast and gifts on Monday morning then off to my apartment to make Christmas dinner. I got a turkey and a ham from my company so we're going to eat those and make some stuffing and maybe Gwen's corn-y goodness. I think The BF's Crazy Libra Friend will be joining for the sing a long and for the dinner because he is in NY all by his lonesome because his boyfriend is off visiting his family (who have no idea Crazy Libra Friend is even his boyfriend). Oy.

Have a Mary ChrismaHannuKwanzica! Doodle!